Category Archives: Family

FollowCraig: Plastic Plants

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Imagine being a teenager pushing a lawnmower as part of your weekly chores? Every week your dad reminds you; Craig “Cut The Grass”! We had rental houses as well so the grass cutting just seemed to never end. I swore that when I got older my house would have plastic plants and artificial grass, never to do this again. Today I’m 60 years old and just finished watering my freshly planted grass and flowers. What happened? So goes life, we get all wrapped up in our daily chores of work, paying the bills, raising children and dreaming of vacations. My life began to move really fast in my late 20’s and early 30’s. I was working all the time, first in the insurance business and later managing automobile dealerships. My ego was so very large back then, you should have seen me. Fancy clothes, gold jewelery, fast cars and big bar tabs. I remember buying a gold watch made from a 20 dollar solid gold coin, I was nuts! Craig was living a plastic life and yes I had plenty of Plastic Plants. Interesting thing about plastic plants and plastic lives, they start to get dusty and often begin to fade. Those little branches just start to drop off much like the plastic life. The family, fades, falls apart and nothing is shiny anymore. One day you wake up and nothing is real and the craving for something different begins to stir. You begin to search and travel some very risky trails. Life on a tightrope without proper balance, so close to falling, so close to hitting the bottom and never getting up. Then it hits you, plastic plants don’t last because they never needed water. Like life if you’re not needed and you don’t love your plastic world just dies. It took some time for me, it didn’t come easy but I found it; that little secret that had eluded me for so many years. Life and plants need watering. Gold watches, fancy cloths and fast cars speed away. Today I’m not a fake, I have faith, I love and am loved. I don’t have a single plastic plant, and every plant in my life gets a healthy dose of water and love. Now that’s the life!

You’re still reading, I’m still writing, so please keep following….

Craig

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FollowCraig: What color are your Grandchildren?

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Let’s be clear on this, I was born a white guy, into a Mormon family located in California. I didn’t have any control of over who my family would be? What a surprise, I am just like everyone else. Not one of us can pick our family, where and what religion or not we are born. For those of us lucky enough to live here in the USA; “the melting pot of the world” we are hopefully raised to be accepting of our differences and celebrate the common ribbons that tie our lives together. So why is it we have so much racism and fear of those who look, talk or worship different from us? I think it’s fear of the uncertain. As a Christian man, it fascinates me that so many people forget we are all God‘s children. We come in all colors, cultures and faiths. I heard a story the other day of two older German Lutherans who have lived in Los Angeles all their adult live. Over time the neighborhood has evolved and is mostly populated with people of Hispanic heritage. When they go to church they see so many people who are not white Germans, they wonder what color their grandchildren will be? They are afraid their own legacy won’t survive. Why do we forget that our color and heritage does not matter to God? We cannot change the family we were born to, nor the place we were born. We can however choose our beliefs and faith. So, what color are your grandchildren to be? I know the color of mine are love.

I’m still writing, you’re still reading, so please keep following…..

Craig

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FollowCraig: “Junior Seau”

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Suicide! Not all that many years ago my own family suffered the tragic loss of suicide. it’s a milestone of time one never forgets. For many years my response to others on this subject has been “the most selfish act anyone can do to others”. In our family it was the loss of my mothers husband and my stepfather. Today we hear of the tragic loss of the young man; Junior Seau. I remember watching the movie, What Dreams May Come and came to realize we can’t know the inner pain these people are suffering? I will never know really what pain my stepfather was living anymore that the Seau family can imagine what Junior was going through. My views have changed over the years about suicide. I don’t really think it’s something anyone wants to do and cause so much pain in all those around them, it’s only no other options are available and the pain is just to intense. We have no magic pill, no man made solution? I like to think that faith in a greater power would be enough and for some perhaps it is. So today rest in peace Mr. Seau, I for one hope you have found it. To the Seau family, if you believe as I do then you will know that he has just gone home to a safer place.

You’re still reading, I’m still writing, so please keep following….

Craig

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FollowCraig: You Gotta Let Go To Embrace The Flow…John Page Burton

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Some terrific writing from my friend John Burton. A must read!

You Gotta Let Go To Embrace The Flow…John Page Burton.

just keep following…….

Craig

FollowCraig: So Fast!

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So I’m here at home watching a television show about our digital age while writing on my iPad. Later I will review this story on my home computer, edit and then post on; Twitter, Facebook and so many other social media sites using the “Internet“. Would I have ever imagined years ago, when we only had a black & white television, phones with dials and connected to the wall with springlike cords, typewriters (not electric) and the list goes on that I would have an iPad? Not in a million years! So Fast, in just over 45 years or so much has changed. just the other day someone shared a photo of an Internet minute. Have you ever looked to see what happens in only a minute on the Internet? It’s astounding! Life does move fast, it has for me that’s for sure. Now at 60, my children are grown with families of their own. It still seems however like I am still in High School, the world is moving faster than ever and I still love being in it and everyday opens up to a new and thrilling future. Yes we do live in a more and perhaps better connected world and it seems as if we are traveling the speed of light. However when I hear others say we are moving to fast and we must slow down, I wonder what that really means? To me slowing down is not the real objective but rather to keep up, continue to learn, stay connected with the world, engage in life. The wonder of being older is that rather than slowing down, we can look back and reflect on our experiences. Use that knowledge to keep moving forward. A lot does happens in an Internet minute, but experience happens throughout a lifetime. So stay strapped in and hold on!

You’re still reading, I’m still writing, so please keep following…..

Craig

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FollowCraig: ?Peace?

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I’m a child of the 60’s, a baby boomer! The word peace had such a different meaning back then. The war in Vietnam was raging, the Beatles were riding in a yellow submarine and Tim Leary said just drop some acid and drop out! John Lennon’s song “Imagine” perhaps is the rare remnant of that turbulent time that transcends our generations?  We now think of peace as being comfortable in our own skin. I would love to see us all fight for peace in the world like we did back then. I for one have reached so deep for such inner peace that I have often forgotten about the real struggles in our world. Perhaps the real inner peace we are searching for comes from helping others find theirs? Suppose everyday, we just reached out to one new person who could use some help, a hand up or a kind word? Would that not really give us “Inner Peace”? I guess I still have some work to do, how about you?

you’re still reading, I’m still writing, so please keep following…

Craig

FollowCraig: Re-calculating Route

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Her clear discerning voice, reassuring confidence, always certain of her direction! If I make a left, right or wrong turn she is always there “re-calculating route.” Oh the wonderful GPS! Just the other day as I was driving and our in car GPS system once again directed me to exactly the right destination. Calmly and politely re-calculating my route each time I deviated from course. Always forgiving and re-calculating after each wrong turn I might make along my journey. So I began thinking that perhaps all those other wrong turns, you know the ones we make in life? The times we didn’t say no or yes when we could have. The times we told a white lie, when candor and honesty would have been the right thing. All those wrongs, all our little sins? Then for some reason, something happens in our life, we find ourselves asking a higher power for help or perhaps repent for a wrong? Then our direction changes and life is good again. Is it possible that this higher power, could just be our own GPS? Always there to keep us on course, to re-calculate our route after every wrong turn? I have learned that each time my life direction seems off course, when I can’t sleep, when I am worried or when I have just screwed up! I can just stop, go to God, ask forgiveness and follow his direction; my destination once again is clear. Call it prayer, surrendering, repentance or call it crazy but it always works!

I’m still writing, you’re still reading, so please keep following……

Craig

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FollowCraig: Bad Date

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All the fabulous lights below as the plane was landing in Las Vegas about 7:00 pm on a Friday night. Normal for me as I was living there and traveling for business. It had been a long week and I was tired. So out to dinner, (party of one) then a little Jazz music at one of my favorite haunts, nice! Then it happened, she was sitting at the end of the bar, big smile, great eyes, a flashy Las Vegas beauty! I was so shy and she so wasn’t! I think that’s how it happens? You see, I was just finalizing my divorce. So, I was sure ready..Right! It had to written all over me? “Available!” That night was the beginning of what I warmly call “My Long Bad Date” You see, my personal self esteem, my own insecurities and all those years without faith and standards led me to what were to become the greatest life changing events I would ever experience. I married that Las Vegas beauty after a couple of very turbulent years. Oh we fought about everything, she gambled, spent and drank every dollar we had. Everything that was wrong between us became my fault. All I could see was that one beautiful beginning, and I did everything possible to hold it together. In time I grew to fear her, her outbursts of violence and her incredible cruelty to my family, friends, employers and me. My understanding and compassion for abused partners in relationships became crystal clear. It sneaks up on you and attacks the most vulnerable part of your soul. A dear friend later told me; “Craig” She’s not a bad person, but a sick person. Then one day, I just could not take it anymore and I gathered all the courage in me, my faith in God and left. All I had was a suitcase, an old Buick and a few hundred borrowed dollars. You see, I had stopped drinking a couple of years before that day, developed a faith in God and began setting standards for myself. How often have you heard “No Pain No Gain?”, so true! So, that faith and fear pushed me to go forward, just go! That was several years ago. Today I am very free from that abuse and fear. I live a wonderful life and face everyday with joy of the unknown. All I can say to those who suffer in silence the pain, fear and guilt of abuse is; You can change it! It will be, OK! .….more of my journey ahead..

You’re still reading, I’m still writing, so please keep following….

Craig

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FollowCraig: Oh! “****” STOP!!!!

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So one day I am driving along in my car, listening to the radio, just happy as a bird! Suddenly some fool in front of me slammed on his brakes. So after some very fast reaction on my part I was able to STOP! Everything in the car went flying and I of course yelled some very colorful metaphor that would surely make my mother curl. This happens to all of us from time to time, then you pick things up, slow down and go on. That’s what happened to my life at about 51 yrs old or so. It sounded so easy, people around me, support groups I was part of told me “Craig” you can change everything, every problem right now. Just STOP! No one told me the junk in my life would just keep flying like it did in that car? However, just as in the car, the junk did stop flying and I picked it up, tossed some bad stuff out and started again a little bit slower. This is how life works. If we really, truly want to change, to have a better life, perhaps follow a dream forgotten; Then we must stop, pick things up, slowdown and move forward! It took me so long to get that. If you have some experiences with this in your life, please share!

I’m still writing, you’re still reading, so please keep following….

Craig

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FollowCraig: “Miracles”

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As I wrote “ Demons are Green! “ not long ago and how that experience led me to A.A., I was reminded of many miracles in my life, this is a story of one. A few weeks after accepting that I was so powerless over my life, proof was on my doorstep. I was now a commission only car salesman living in Las Vegas, NV. What a place to stop drinking? To paint a picture of Craig at that time would be that of a 350 lb man, very broke, lost most of his friends, family was staying clear, divorced, living with a very difficult girlfriend! Now living a new “Born Again Life” Right! However I did have one friend, a new friend, a fellow friend of “Bill W.” His name is: Bob “D”. So here is what happened, I went to work on a Saturday morning, stood outside all day and worked very hard to sell a car. When the end of the day came and I walked to get in my car to go home, it was gone! My car was gone! It had been repossessed! Oh, my what was I going to do? My boss was kind enough to loan me a car for the weekend so I was not without, but what was I going to do Monday? I was in such panic, such worry. Later at home I was on the phone to my only new friend, Bob “D”. After all my tears and crying on the phone he said these words to me; Craig, when you get off the phone; “Get on your knees, thank GOD for everything you have and everything he has taken away; ask him to take on your troubles for tonight and give you a nights sleep.” I assure you “Bob” said to me; “Craig you won’t be walking”, GOD will be certain your needs are met. Me the ever-living skeptic said sure Bob! But I thought, oh what can I lose by trying this prayer thing? So, my knees went to the floor and I handed my troubles to GOD to watch over as my friend said to do. MONDAY: Now the worry is back and I go to work. By then it seemed everyone around me knew what had happened a I was being asked all day about my troubles. Then the MIRACLE! Our car dealership had taken in trade an older Cadillac earlier that day, a very pretty white one and a very nice car but to old for the dealership to sell. When I asked my boss about it, he was willing to sell it to me, but I had no money! However, he said to me “Craig you can & could pay for it out of your next two paychecks and drive it home today!” As I am writing this, tears are running down my face as I remember just one of so many MIRACLES in my life! My friend Bob was right, I was not going to be walking. That car became my GOD car and that led to a Greater MIRACLE that was to occur some years later..More to come!

I’m still writing, your still reading, so please keep following…..

Craig

12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous – 12 Step Recovery.

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